Cheers 2 Ears!
Two dudes named Aaron toasting their way through the Disney resorts. New episodes drop every Monday morning
Cheers 2 Ears!
Crafting the Hillbilly Club 33 with a Moonshine Margarita
What happens when moonshine meets the Magic Kingdom? We're sipping on authentic moonshine margaritas from Disney's Fort Wilderness while dreaming up the most exclusive—and eccentric—club Disney has never seen.
Prepare yourself for a wild journey as we craft "Hillbilly Club 33" from the ground up. This fictional collaboration between the Clampett family (yes, of Beverly Hillbillies fame) and the Disney empire reimagines luxury through Appalachian eyes. Picture a double-wide trailer perched above Frontierland's Golden Horseshoe, complete with taxidermy, toll paintings, and a grand chandelier made of deer antlers and gold-plated mason jars.
The dress code? Semi-clean overalls and straw hats only, please—no ball caps allowed at this highfalutin establishment. Membership costs range from delightfully peculiar (payment in homemade preserves) to outlandishly specific (one pound of meth or 100 squirrels for the kitchen). Perks include private ride entrances disguised as barn doors, exclusive access to front porches on Main Street, and birthday announcements in Jed Clampett's voice over park loudspeakers.
We've developed an entire menu of signature moonshine cocktails, from the Backwoods Mule to the Possum Punch, alongside culinary innovations like caviar grits, trailer park nachos, and Moon Pie Mountain dessert. Each menu item balances the line between parody and genuine intrigue—much like our entire concept.
This episode captures the joy of reimagining Disney's exclusive experiences through a different cultural lens, asking what happens when backwoods meets VIP status. Listen in and let your imagination run wild with us—just don't forget your flask of shine and straw hat!
Here's who we are and what is in store for you
Hello and welcome to Cheers to Ears, where today we're sipping on a moonshine margarita.
Speaker 2:We are.
Speaker 1:From Disney's Fort Waterness Lodge and Campgrounds and it's $16 for this drink there.
Speaker 2:That's not bad for Disney.
Speaker 1:No, they make it with old, smoky white lightning, moonshine, bull's Triple Sec liqueur, sweet and sour mix and lime juice. And how do we make it there, aaron?
Speaker 2:We did Moonshine. What is it? Moonlight, moonshine. So that was the only difference. We did have Bowls, triple Sec, liqueur, sweet and sour mix and lime juice. So we did two ounces of the Moonshine, a shot ounce and a half of the triple sec, a splash of sweet and sour mix and about two ounces of lime juice, or about an ounce of lime juice each. Yeah, okay, because I mixed up a batch. Right, because when you make margaritas you make a batch.
Speaker 1:When you make moonshine, you make a batch of everything, you make a batch of everything, right?
Speaker 2:So why are we doing moonshine? Well, let's talk about this. Let's talk about the drink.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's earthy.
Speaker 2:It is. It's got a raisiny quality. Yeah, kind of like the Ottawa Apple at Epcot.
Speaker 1:But not as good.
Speaker 2:Not as good, no, but it has that moonshine. It's coming forward.
Speaker 1:Right. Like I said when we first had it, it makes you want to puck, Puck your lips and blow into a jug.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's what it tastes like.
Speaker 2:It's a different tasting margarita, for sure.
Speaker 1:Right, it's sitting on the porch. It's not a breezy signature Mark Telling a story. Well, that's fancy.
Speaker 2:That's fancy.
Speaker 1:Fancy stuff like that and the moonshine. You can't have moonshine and that fancy. And fancy no, and that leads us to our topic. Yes, right into it. That's a good segue into our topic.
Speaker 2:Because you might find a breezy signature Marg at a highfalutin place like Club 33. Right, but where?
Speaker 1:would you find a lowbrow Marg? Well, it's what we came up with the name after different names, we came up with this. Yes, this topic is Hillbilly, club 33.
Speaker 2:Hillbilly Club 33, because I was told Redneck Club 33 was not quite PC. I guess you can't call people rednecks this just sounds better.
Speaker 1:You can't call them hillbillies.
Speaker 2:This just sounds better According to the millennials in our life. Are they millennials?
Speaker 1:I don't know what they are.
Speaker 2:They are Gen Z, are they? I think so had to ask them. Yeah, they would know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, whatever a 19-year-old is these days, yeah, that's who told us. We're Gen X, so Hillbilly is way better, yeah, and that inspired me, that word inspired me a lot for this it did.
Speaker 2:Yes, I would have been fine with redneck, but I think hillbilly opened up some ideas that maybe redneck wouldn't have.
Speaker 1:And after talking to Eli about it last week when we were, that gave me my backstory for how hillbilly club 33 came into disneyland. Oh, why don't you tell us that?
Speaker 2:oh, let me tell you okay.
Speaker 1:So back in the day walt disney met jed clampett. Okay, they formed a good relationship there because he had a fancy house in beverly yes right in beverly hill.
Speaker 2:Beverly hills all right, which is a few miles away from las filas, which is where walt lived yes, they were kind of neighbors almost Almost yeah. Same circles Straight down Sunset Boulevard.
Speaker 1:They might have went to the same bank.
Speaker 2:They may have Right.
Speaker 1:So they were talking one day and talking about Walt Disney said he wanted to have some kind of fancy place at Disney for people to go. Yeah, and Jed Clampett's like I have a highfalutin idea for you, right. Yeah, and Jed Clampett's, like I have a highfalutin idea for you, right. What if we teamed up and did this? Ah, and so they teamed up. It's a partnership between the Clampett family and the Disney family and Disney family. Okay, right, To make a fancy highfalutin place, but there's no.
Speaker 2:Up from the ground bubbling crude.
Speaker 1:No, he already had that.
Speaker 2:He already that. He already that's.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he's already there, yeah he's already rich and he already has all his money. Okay, he's just spending it how he wants, like he does, how he wants, right how did you approach yours?
Speaker 2:because we, of course we don't talk about this beforehand we come up with an idea and then we kind of go with it, although I did let you know kind of where I was going with it.
Speaker 1:That helped a lot Today, just knowing Because that made me take away some of the stuff I was going to do and add a few things I wouldn't to equal up to yours. So we're on the same page.
Speaker 2:Okay, because I did where it's at decor, address code cost, entry cost and the yearly maintenance cost.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Perks. And then I did food, because Club 33 is about dining Right Highfalutin, fancy dining.
Speaker 1:I have all those same things, so why don't you start with your first one and we'll go back and forth when?
Speaker 2:it's at.
Speaker 1:Where it's at.
Speaker 2:So mine. It's an upper floor restaurant that they've perched. It's basically a double wide trailer because it's hillbilly, but it's highfalutin hillbilly, so it's a double-wide, not a single-wide, but it's overlooking Harbor Boulevard. You're outside the park, on the edge of the park, okay, oh, okay, yeah, I actually did. I did put it in the park, but it's far away from the regular crowd. You know they want them there, but they don't want them there, right, so they put them off to where they're looking over Harbor Boulevard and the lounge. The lounge is off to the side of the main restaurant area. Okay To it, yeah, but it's all kind of right there, but it's up in the air, second story, so can look down on the, on the average folk, right? Yeah, the non hillbilly rich hillbillies, perfect so my location.
Speaker 1:Well, first of all, my slogan. Their slogan is a high society with a heap and helping of hospitality okay, okay, okay yeah. Mine's located in Frontierland.
Speaker 2:That makes sense.
Speaker 1:And they built it above the Golden Horseshoe.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:They just added on and built it up there.
Speaker 2:And that would make sense. Yeah, good location.
Speaker 1:Jed really pushed for that. I think Walt was like more your idea.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:More like keep him kind of away.
Speaker 2:In my multiverse, Walt went out. In your multiverse, Jed went out. You know, it's as simple as that. They came to an agreement.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that it would still. Yeah, it would be above and not like take over the golden horseshoe which maybe Jed wanted to have a front porch there.
Speaker 2:So would it be the second floor of?
Speaker 1:the golden horseshoe. Yeah Well, they would add a story floor of the gold bush.
Speaker 2:Well, they would add a story On top of the, on top of the second floor. Second floor, oh yeah, so it's even taller, it's even higher up.
Speaker 1:It's way up there.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's really looking down on the little folks. It's looking down and people look like ants.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's exactly where mine's located. Okay, what's your next one? Go ahead.
Speaker 2:So in the main dining hall restaurant it's eight-foot folding banquet tables, you know, the kind you typically find at churches and whatnot, with red or blue checkered plastic tablecloths. It's decorated tastefully with taxidermy and toll paintings. Okay, you know, wooden objects painted. My mom was really into that back in the day. Yeah, you know, as a painted my mom was really into that back in the day. Yeah, you know, as a lot of moms were the outside lounge area folding lounge chairs.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:So you know, it's the old school kind with the webbing and the aluminum Right? Yeah, one of those bad boys.
Speaker 1:With that, whatever that material was, it scratched your yeah shorts yeah, scratch your legs.
Speaker 2:Plastic plastic key, yeah, yeah, not quite sure what it is, but folding, you know they've got to be very comfortable, though plastic weave with stacked milk crates or tire rims for tables. Okay, tables, but they're, you know, like a tire rim is not going to be flat. You can't sit your drink down, so it's covered with, you know, an old piece of plywood or a piece of cardboard. Right, yeah, and that's the decor, that's your decor. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, my decor is rocking chairs.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:With velvet upholstery Ooh nice. And a big chandelier In the intro. It has a big chandelier, but it's made of deer antlers and gold-plated mason jars Ooh Right. And then the big thing is a huge, large cement pond.
Speaker 2:In the back.
Speaker 1:You can fish in it. Right, there'll be some fish in there sometimes. Yeah, you can swim in it. There'll be some fish in there sometimes. Yeah, you can swim in it. The cement pond there's all sorts of things to do in the cement pond. Nice, that's the main focal point. Okay, that's my decor decor, okay.
Speaker 2:So next I went into dress code. Because there is a dress code for for regular club 33, there's got to be for hillbilly club 33, right? So for men, overalls in a semi-clean button-up shirt, okay, you know, not big grease stains. If there's a little food saying that, you know, we'll let that slide. And no jeans, no jeans. But you can wear overalls in denim, denim overalls. Those are fine because those are a little more dressy than a regular pair of jeans. Of course, yeah, and for the ladies, only a sundress okay yeah, I thought about adding the polyester pantsuit.
Speaker 2:It seemed appropriate, but I think we're we're past that as far as I don't think anybody owns those anymore you don't think you can find them?
Speaker 1:no, oh, but you can make them and that could be part of your.
Speaker 2:Now, exactly that could be, because I do have 133 where.
Speaker 1:I do have a few merch things. Oh, well, that makes sense, of course, because I always had merch.
Speaker 2:So if somebody did show up in a polyester pantsuit, they wouldn't be, they would be fine. Okay, yeah, it's one of those. It's not in the rules, but it's a gray area, they'll let it slide. Right now, you can always substitute your son to go to meet and close right, absolutely that's the first thing you think of and hats are acceptable, but they all need to be made of straw, some form of a straw hat, you know. No ball caps, no trucker hats, no ball caps no, it's, it's now.
Speaker 2:Yes, it's normalire, but that's for your average hillbilly. Now, if it's a straw hat, yeah, that's okay. That's classing it up a little bit.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:And it has to be a little bit classy Ball caps.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's good, that's what you have.
Speaker 2:That's my dress code.
Speaker 1:Mine's a lot simpler. Okay, mine is just a dress code. Come as you are, as long as it's patched and practical. Patched and practical, okay, you can wear whatever you want. Works, just no holes in the stuff if you have a hole in it, just patch it up. Just patch it up before you come. You can do that.
Speaker 2:You can spend the time to patch up the hole in your jeans yeah come on, you're going to club 33 and I mean put a patch on it even if you aren't going to sew it on there, you can get that, that glue right and glue a patch over it new merch idea t-shirts that say put a patch on it.
Speaker 1:Put a patch on it, that's that's my old dress code.
Speaker 2:Put a patch on it, okay. What do you have for? What's the entry cost in the yearly maintenance fee? Do you have that? Yes, I do, but I put it somewhere.
Speaker 1:You're scrambling, I'm scrambling. I put my paper in the back. I have my pricing is I should have had this.
Speaker 2:All Mine is stuff, it's not actual cash, oh dues Dues.
Speaker 1:Okay, right, dues can be paid in cash. Oh, yours can. Okay, cash could be a thing.
Speaker 2:I'm just assuming they don't have any.
Speaker 1:But you can also pay in chickens or handmade preserves Ooh.
Speaker 2:That's nice. Mine went a little dark.
Speaker 1:I thought you would If I want to do. I know I've got to get my pages here together, so the initial cost to get in, not the yearly maintenance.
Speaker 2:The initial cost it's one pound of 60% minimum pure meth. What, what? Hey, the shine making shine isn't paying the bills. They're making meth now.
Speaker 1:You're making people pay at Disney in meth.
Speaker 2:In meth. Yeah, hey, this is what. What happens. You can't even drink in the park. Well, you can't bring the meth in the park, you just have to. Where do you? Who do you pay the meth to? Well, that, that's classified, because they have to turn around and, you know, sell it wholesale you did 100 squirrels darker than I thought you'd go.
Speaker 2:100 squirrels, you know for the cooking for them. You did go. A hundred squirrels. That's darker than I thought you'd go. A hundred squirrels, you know for the cooking for them. Fancy dinners. You need a hundred squirrels to get in and 10 gallons of moonshine. That's your initial due. That's your initial fee. Now yearly it's just the moonshine and 50 squirrels. So you got to go hit the still cook up 10 gallons of shine. Give it to Disney so that it offsets the cost of the bar, and 50 squirrels offsetting some of the food.
Speaker 1:A little-known fact Aaron is a developer of the new Grand Theft Auto Hillbilly Edition. I've never played that game. It sounds like that game it does. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Okay, so is that your total cost?
Speaker 1:My total cost. I don't have a price Chickens and Chickens, and or cash. I don't have the exact price that's. I mean, we're going to keep something secret for all the members to know. Oh, that's true, right, yeah, common folk don't get to know. So, common hillbillies? Okay, okay. What are the perks? Okay, I have quite a few perks. Okay, okay, they're all very fancy perks. Okay, okay, private ride entrances disguised as barn doors Okay, oh, so it looks like a barn door and you get to go in only, and you know where those are.
Speaker 2:You know where those are at.
Speaker 1:Right, it goes right into the ride. Excellent Backwoods buggy rides that go with the backstage. Oh, but it's on a buggy. Exclusive, exclusive, I mean exclusive access to all front porches on Main Street, oh, okay.
Speaker 2:That's a good one. That's street. Oh okay, that's a good one. That's a good one. I kind of like that one. Yeah, now I'm surprised you went with a buggy instead of like an old, like chevy square body right in the back of that.
Speaker 1:I don't have a car, I have other vehicles I still have more vehicles.
Speaker 2:I'm not done okay, what else are your perks?
Speaker 1:front row seats to disneyland's new country bears reimagined new, new show they're gonna show finally, yeah, finally bringing country bears back to disneyland that'd be the best thing.
Speaker 2:Bears Reimagined New show. They're going to have New show Finally, yeah, finally, bringing country bears back to Disneyland. That'd be the best thing ever. I just had to add that in, because there's not enough shows.
Speaker 1:There are no shows.
Speaker 2:Right yeah, there's no shows.
Speaker 1:Yeah Right, a discount on all the I struck oil at Disney merchandise. It's a whole line. It's a whole line. It's a whole line that you came up with.
Speaker 2:I struck oil at Disney. I didn't even come up with a line. There's lounge flies, there's shirts. The lounge flies make total sense, right? Just think of how cool it could be.
Speaker 1:Why wouldn't you have lounge flies? It strikes oil, that little thing. That oil comes out. That's great.
Speaker 2:Now I have to backtrack here a little bit. Is this exclusive to anybody who wants to identify as a hillbilly, or do you actually have to be from the Appalachia area of the US?
Speaker 1:I think the application process will weed out that kind of stuff and they could decide I mean, I don't want to make that decision. Anyone's allowed to apply. Okay, we accept all applications yeah but I don't want to. I can't go in the details of who we select. No, because that I mean that's privileged information that is privileged right, so you could apply. Just there's certain questions. I didn't write out a questionnaire, which would have been a good idea. Oh yeah, I know, I didn't think about that. The questions they can ask too.
Speaker 2:Part two of the Hillbilly Club. 33 questionnaire application.
Speaker 1:Right. More official. Here's official Club 33 apparel Okay. Overalls with gold embroidery, ooh, raccoon tail, mouse ears and Club 33 mason jars. Oh yeah, those are all I mean. Just think how much those would go on eBay. Yeah, man, how much meth you could sell with your words.
Speaker 2:Well, you could wholesale buy that pound and turn around, yeah.
Speaker 1:Right, you could also have a VIP hayride from Main Street to Frontierland Nice. Get right on there by the train station Uh-huh, hop on a hayride and it goes right to Club 33.
Speaker 2:Nice, right down Main Street.
Speaker 1:All the people can look at you, knowing where you're going.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they know Right, not because of your clothes.
Speaker 1:Right Reserve fireworks seating with blankets and hot cobblers. Reserve fireworks seating with blankets and hot cobblers. And when it's your birthday, this is the coolest one when it's your birthday over the loudspeakers at Disney during the day, once per day. I don't have a time, but the voice of Jethro Clampett announces your birthday over the loudspeaker With a yeehaw, with a yeehaw, or it could be Jed Clampett announces your birthday over the loudspeaker With a yeehaw, with a yeehaw, or it could be Jed Clampett that says well, doggies, yes, and those are my perks. Nice, I'm scared of your perks now.
Speaker 2:No, mine are good, but they're not necessarily there's no hookers involved, right? Well, that's not a hookers aren't?
Speaker 1:a hillbilly thing. I don't know where you're going with this.
Speaker 2:Hey, I'm nervous. I mean, I know Breaking Bad has us all like think all the meth freaks are down in Albuquerque, but but Justified, I'm sure yes, there are some rolling meth labs cruising through the Appalachia.
Speaker 1:Justified, has that trailer city. We're getting dark here we're getting crazy.
Speaker 2:We are Go on to your perks, here we go, so you get entry into the parks year round. You get into the parks Just free. Yes, with it, with this part of it, that is your year pass. Okay, downside is you have to come in after everybody else. You can't be in the regular line. You have to come in. Okay, you know, because Club 33 is out on Harbor Boulevard on the edge of the property. Well, you can come in, but wait till the lines die down before you're coming in. But they're exclusive. Disney critter meet and greets. Okay, yeah, all the critters. Yeah, critter Country, any critters they had, you're going to meet them. The bears, chip and.
Speaker 1:Dale.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all the critters. Yeah, Critter Country, any critters they had, you're going to meet them. The bears Chip and Dale yeah, all the critters. I like this Exclusive Wow Critters that other people don't get to meet.
Speaker 1:That's amazing you do get to meet them, just don't eat them.
Speaker 2:You get monthly shindigs at the Hillbilly Club. Oh, the Hillbilly Club, 33 Double Wide.
Speaker 1:That's the name. That's kind of the technical name. Yeah, technical name.
Speaker 2:Monthly shindigs with some bluegrass banjos a-playing. Yeah, yeah, all that good stuff. You have complete access for the Double Wide Dining Hall and Old Still Lounge. That's the name of them. Double Wide Dining Hall and the Old Still Lounge Wow, that's the name of them. Double wide dining hall in the old still lounge wow, which is right off to the side. Yeah, you get a flask okay, yeah, full of shine. Every time you go.
Speaker 2:Every time you go, you just get a flask full of shine, flask full of shine upon entry to your club 33 whenever you go to club 33 right, just walk in here's your flask of shine well, you get to refill your flask okay, you keep your flask.
Speaker 1:You got it. Make sure you keep your flask.
Speaker 2:So you get the flask of shine. Well, you get to refill your flask. Okay, you keep your flask. You got to make sure you keep your flask.
Speaker 1:So you get the flask. On membership yes, and then you take it with you and you take it with you.
Speaker 2:Okay, and you get a sticker for your pickup window. You know how people put stickers in their windows. Oh yeah, you get an exclusive. You only, right, get that Club 33 for your pickup window. That's a great idea. Or your old 78 Chevy Impala. Okay yeah, whatever you're driving, that's a good one.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So those are my perks.
Speaker 1:Your perks are good. I like how we have totally different Club 33s. So my question is that I don't remember what you said. Do you have to pay in MEF? Is that the only way to pay?
Speaker 2:Yes, because it shows the level of seriousness. So if I wanted to fill out an application, I have to be able to find meth and, honestly, you're cooking it, so it's not costing you quite as much. Yeah, we're going off a street value and it only has to be 60% pure.
Speaker 1:Because you're, I mean I'm in for everything but the meth cooking, as far as if I would apply myself yeah right like so that's. That's the one thing keeping me away, because I want a shindig. I want a shindig in a flask.
Speaker 2:You don't want to cook any meth we might, might have to think, you know, because that has to be like handled off property. Yeah, there's some sketchiness to that I don't know.
Speaker 1:Like six, seven members die a year of blowing up their selves yeah or raid that is the cost of getting into club hillbilly, club 33.
Speaker 2:You might, you might, blow yourself up. Okay, do you have any other categories that you needed to cover? Well, I know, because I just have food and drinks that you find at the Club 33.
Speaker 1:I think I just have food and drinks also.
Speaker 2:Double Wide Dining Hall and Old Still Lounge.
Speaker 1:Right, and so, like we do, you went quite a bit of food probably.
Speaker 2:I have a bunch of food, but I have, I believe, eight drinks.
Speaker 1:I have four food items and two, four, five drinks and three mocktails.
Speaker 2:Okay, oh, you went mocktails. Okay, oh, you went mocktails. Okay, see, I figured mocktail would just be. I don't know If you're a hillbilly, does beer count as a mocktail?
Speaker 1:I don't know it would. In your style, I'm a little more, mine's a little more classy.
Speaker 2:Sweet tea and lemonade. There's your mocktails Right. That's your non-alcoholic sweet tea or lemonade.
Speaker 1:There's sweet tea and lemonade involved in a lot of my stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there is. So what do you have as your drinks?
Speaker 1:My drinks Want to go drinks first.
Speaker 2:Should I start, since I have more? Yeah, start with your menu. Give us your menu. So one of my drinks Backwoods Mule, it's a twist on the Moscow Mule. So Backwoods Mule, it's a twist on the Moscow Mule, so it has moonshine, ginger beer and lime juice. Now, it's not fresh lime juice, it's lime juice from that green bottle that you buy at the grocery store.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Right, yeah, now, unless there's a bigger bottle. But it's like in bulk, okay, but it's not fresh. It's a Winco bottle, yeah, so much like what we're having here. It's a Shinerita, it's a moonshine margarita.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Moonshine Kuiper orange liqueur, because that's the cheapest stuff that you can find. Yeah, and for your lime, this one gets a little special it's a melted lime, otter pop, that's good.
Speaker 2:I like that. Shake that up. You can have that blended or over ice, you know however you want. And then you know, of course, your salt rim. I have an appellation, old-fashioned okay, moonshine brown sugar, oh, bitters and orange peel, they're all, they're all. Moonshine, all moonshine. Base, white lightning lemonade, which is just moonshine and lemonade, and then it this is served in a lemon jar or a mason jar. Okay, I forgot to mention all the other drinks served in a tin cup. Okay, yeah, everything else served into.
Speaker 2:Now, the moonshine mojito that has a lot, lot of fresh lime juice and mint, blah, blah, blah. All that stuff. No, it's a little too confusing. Mine is just Moonshine with a little mint and Sprite, because I get your lemon lime. I would drink a Sprite. It's a mocktail. It's your Moonshine Mojito. I have a Bootlegger's Bramble, which we recently had, a Bramble, good, moonshine, muddled blackberries and lemonade and simple syrup. A Sweet Tea, shiner, which is Moonshine, brewed black tea, simple syrup and lemon. And then I have, okay, this is the only non-moonshine which you could substitute moonshine for, maybe they will Okay, which you could substitute moonshine for it, maybe they will Okay. It's a manmosa, which is the drink we almost had with this. Right, but it's beer, vodka and orange juice. Yes, yeah, manmosa. So those are all my drinks. Good, let's hear yours.
Speaker 1:My drinks I have the black gold, old-fashioned. Okay, I'm a little fancier than you. Okay, I'm a little fancier than you. Okay, my idea is a little more fancy because my guy's already rich. That's helping Disney make this right, mm-hmm, I have a rich hillbilly making this joint, yeah, but there's no meth involved in mine.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, jed was back in the 50s, right, they've adapted to the times.
Speaker 1:Right. So a black gold, old-fashioned is bourbon, black walnut bitters and an orange twist. Oh, that actually sounds good. An Ellie Mae, old-fashioned Ellie Mae, martini oh, okay, that's the one. I haven't named after anyone, any character or anything. Vodka, elderflower, muddle blueberries and lemonade. Oh Okay, it's a good fancy drink it sounds fancy the porch sipper, apple pie, moonshine, okay, sweet Tea and Lemon Juice.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, lemon juice from like real lemons or no? Probably not, probably just lemon juice. A bottle of lemon juice, green bottle, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the Winco bottle. Yeah, then I have the Jug of Juice. Jug of Juice, this is a one guest drink. It's huge. Yes, the jug of juice is a large punch with spiced rum, pineapple grenadine and a float of moonshine.
Speaker 2:oh, probably a large float large float, very large right, and then the possum punch.
Speaker 1:What's in the Possum Punch? That's pomegranate, bourbon, ginger beer and mint. That sounds horrible. It sounds horrible, yeah, but they'll love it. It's Possum Punch. Possum Punch sounds horrible in itself. My mocktails are the Seamint Palm Cooler, which is just lemonade and club soda, okay Okay. The Sweet Tea Sparkle, which is tea, peach syrup and Sprite. That might be good, actually, yeah. And the Hootenholler Root Beer Float, which is a craft root beer with vanilla ice cream in a mason jar. Yeah, that sounds good too.
Speaker 2:That's on my drinks.
Speaker 1:Okay, your menu. I only have four menu items, so do your menu.
Speaker 2:Okay, so I have starters. Okay, the deep-fried sampler, deep-fried pickles. So I have starters. Okay, the deep fried sampler, deep fried pickles, squirrel and possum pieces and deep fried cheese. Okay, it's just a little bit of each Right.
Speaker 1:Each of the good stuff, yeah.
Speaker 2:Trailer park nachos. Okay, Doritos covered in melted Velveeta, hot dog coins and a drizzle of gas station chili.
Speaker 2:Okay, pickled roulette, pickled egg roulette, one of them. So you get pickled eggs. One of them is ghost pepper infused, you know playing a little game with your friends there. And then possum poppers, jalapenos stuffed with cream cheese and bits of cooked possum. Those are my starters. Wow, those are to whet the appetite, yikes. Then I have main dishes. Okay, first one bucket of gravy. Okay, it's literally a metal pail of sausage gravy served with a biscuit canoe in the middle of it.
Speaker 1:A biscuit canoe.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but it's just a big bucket of gravy. Nice, the Chitterling Chimichanga, surprise, surprise. So it's squirrel wrapped in a tortilla, deep fried and smothered in beer cheese, hillbilly Surf and Turf Spam Steak and a single fried catfish tail on a bed of tater tots. It's hillbilly surf and turf chicken, fried possum, served with cream corn and appalachian lasagna. Appalachian lasagna, layers of bacon, mashed potatoes, american cheese and gravy. So which is really similar to like a kfc, I think.
Speaker 1:But not even close at the same time.
Speaker 2:Except for they have like chunks of fried chicken instead of bacon. Yeah, bacon, mashed potatoes, american cheese and gravy. Yeah, so that's my Appalachian lasagna. So those are all my entrees. Okay, you have desserts? Then I have some sides, oh sides, that you can pick Canned green beans. Okay, just have desserts. Then I have some sides, oh sides, that you can pick Canned green beans.
Speaker 1:Okay, just a can, yeah, a can, plopped out a can of green beans.
Speaker 2:Warm up a can and then put the can down Right. Buttered saltines, okay, cool. Whipped coleslaw, oh yuck. Fried mayo balls with ranch and honey mustard dip, and then cornbread, because balls with ranch and honey, mustard dip and then cornbread, because I mean that?
Speaker 2:just just cornbread, yeah, corn. Some goods on the menu, yeah so. And then desserts, you know, to wrap up your meal moon pie mountain, which is three stack moon pies glued together with marshmallow fluff, topped with m&ms okay, a funnel cake, lasagna, layers of deep fried funnel cake, nutella and bacon crumbles. Oreo casserole Crushed Oreos, marshmallows and sweetened condensed milk baked in a skillet, served molten. That might not be bad, yeah, is there more.
Speaker 2:And then just pecan pie. Okay, auntie Eunice's pecan pie, just a pecan pie. Yeah, so we make up a character, auntie Eunice. Oh, you have a character you made up, yes, oh, okay, yeah, we've introduced a character called Auntie Eunice and she has a pecan pie. Wow, yeah, so that's it. That is my menu for Hillbilly Club 33, double Y Dining Hall and the Old Still Lounge. The old still lounge.
Speaker 1:Your menu has lots of depth to it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:My questions are as follows Do they double the janitorial service to your Club 33? No, and do they get hazard pay?
Speaker 2:See, these are stabilized guts, so these would normally this type of food would kill us, right? It would just harm us instantly, right? But these, the people that are applying for Hillbilly Club 33, they're used to eating like this. Okay, so this is just Tuesday, so this isn't going to cause them to have to rush off to the bathroom multiple times, right? It's just normal. Just normal digestive tract working after eating all that stuff, right?
Speaker 1:so, of course, my I have an extensive menu, yeah, of course, but I'm just going to tell you for the highlight, like highlight, like specialties right, yeah, and then you have to apply and then look at the menu when you get there right, right.
Speaker 2:So these are just some of the things. I've given away, a lot of the secrets. Right you have, I have. I've peeled back the layers.
Speaker 1:The veil, so I have caviar grits. Caviar grits are on the menu. Smoked trout with collard pesto. I don't even know what that is. Sounds good, though. Oh yeah, I was thinking collard greens, but collard pesto sounds delicious.
Speaker 2:I'm surprised they smoked the trout instead of just frying it up in some cornmeal. These are specialties. Yeah, these are like they're going all out. Right, it's Disney, you got to remember. It's Disney, they're going to go all out.
Speaker 1:You can get a cornbread cream brulee. Okay, it's pretty delicious, yeah, and what everyone always orders. You never know what you're going to get when you get Granny's Mystery Surprise, but you better eat it. You have to eat it. You have to eat it. Yes, that's the thing. Yeah, you have to eat everything that you order.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the thing. Yeah, you have to eat everything that you order.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would think the ears would have a lot of casseroles.
Speaker 2:You're not you're probably not admitting to it because you can't. You know you're.
Speaker 1:You're keeping some of the mystery hidden right, I think a casser I mean probably lots of casseroles, yeah with you know, potato chips right crunched up on top for the table yeah, for the table.
Speaker 2:Eats yeah, family style, family style entrees. Bring you out a casserole Right, just plop it down.
Speaker 1:Peas and tuna fish. One of those Noodles, dark brown glass dishes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, little Pyrex, right 70s Pyrex. All your drinks served in a mason jar tin cup. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I mean, I don't know. I don't know. I think I would join this. I would join mine for sure. The only thing that's getting me away from yours is the meth. Is the meth? I'm just anti-meth for some reason, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Well, most of us are.
Speaker 1:Might just be me.
Speaker 2:I was trying to think of what would really attract the hillbilly.
Speaker 1:And you were thinking what would make me cringe?
Speaker 2:No, it was more of what would attract the hillbilly, because you shocked me. I thought you were going to be dark you see, the average guy isn't going to cook up a pound of meth Right. We wouldn't know how. We literally don't know how or do you.
Speaker 1:So next week join us for Aaron's Meth Recipe and more Cheers to Ears topics.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Cheers, cheers.
