Cheers 2 Ears!
Two dudes named Aaron toasting their way through the Disney resorts. New episodes drop every Monday morning
Cheers 2 Ears!
The Duality of Disney: How Service Members Experience the Parks With a Shades of Green
Calling all military Disney fans! We're taking you on a special journey to Shades of Green, Walt Disney World's exclusive military resort that offers incredible value and luxury accommodations for active duty, retired, and disabled veterans. Nestled near the Polynesian Resort, this hidden gem provides standard rooms starting at just $179 per night while delivering all the perks of a deluxe Disney property.
As we explore the unique benefits of Shades of Green, including early park entry, personalized transportation, and family suites that sleep up to ten guests, we can't help but let our imaginations run wild. What would happen if iconic military movie characters visited Disney World? How would they experience the magic?
From the disciplined Admiral Nimitz maintaining military precision while rope-dropping Magic Kingdom to Colonel Jessup from "A Few Good Men" attempting to commandeer the Jungle Cruise, we create hilarious scenarios for characters from each branch of service. Picture Captain Willard from "Apocalypse Now" narrating his way through Small World like a haunting mission, or the astronauts from "The Right Stuff" setting records on Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run before driving their Corvettes in formation to the next park.
Our comedic journey through fictional military personnel experiencing Disney reminds us of the company's long-standing commitment to service members. Whether it's Gomer Pyle getting evacuated from every ride or Coast Guard Captain Billy Tyne critiquing the currents on Jungle Cruise, these imaginary scenarios highlight the unique perspectives military personnel bring to vacation experiences.
If you've ever wondered about Disney's military accommodations or simply want to laugh at the thought of Full Metal Jacket's Joker contemplating the "duality of man" at Haunted Mansion, this episode delivers both practical information and creative entertainment. Join us for this special tribute to the men and women who serve while celebrating Disney's dedication to making magic accessible to military families.
Here's who we are and what is in store for you
Hello and welcome to Tears to Ears, where today we're traveling across the way to Shades of Green. Yes, Shades of Green is a military restaurant and we're going to drink a Shades of Green drink. It's a military Restaurant, it's a military resort with military restaurants.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:This one's at Evergreen Sports Bar at Shades of Green Resort at Disney World and we're having the Shades of Green drink at Shades of Green at the Evergreen Sports Bar at Shades of Green Resort at Disney World and we're having the Shades of Green drink at Shades of Green at the Evergreen Sports Bar and it's made with vodka, midori, pineapple and orange and is only $11.
Speaker 2:And that's exactly what we put in it Shot of Midori, shot of vodka, shot of orange juice and I don't know about three ounces of I don't know how big are those little cans of pineapple juice. I split one in between the two, so three ounces of pineapple juice, one small can of pineapple juice.
Speaker 1:Half a small can of pineapple juice.
Speaker 2:Yes, and it's very tasty, refreshing fruity drink.
Speaker 1:I haven't had Midori in a long time. It is a shade of green. It is a shade of green.
Speaker 2:It's kind of. Yeah, it is a lime green color. I wasn't even sure what Midori was. Oh really, and you had to look it up, really, yeah. I survived on it for a long time, in my early 20s, and then, when I did look it up, I was like, oh well, there's lots of drinks we've seen that have melon liqueur. So I was like, okay, we'll splurge for the full bottle.
Speaker 1:We have it in our repertoire.
Speaker 2:So very good. Not alcohol forward at all, no, just fruity, Fruity, and you're getting like I can taste the melon in there, the orange, the pineapple, of course.
Speaker 1:And it blends together well. It's not tangy at all.
Speaker 2:Not tangy, not overly sweet, not sour.
Speaker 1:No, no tartness and it blends together well. It's not tangy at all.
Speaker 2:Not tangy not, not sour sweet not sour, no, no, tartness, they're very good. Yeah, and it's only 11 bucks. I know which. All the drinks there are, yeah, around. There's gonna be either that or we were gonna do another one that was similar in ingredients and I forgot what the name of that one was, but it was a potential of a couple of drinks. Yeah, but 11 bucks. 11 bucks, that means you can get, instead of two drinks, you can get three.
Speaker 1:Shades of green. You can, but there's a caveat, caveat.
Speaker 2:Explain to us shades of green.
Speaker 1:Well, I'll try. I don't want anything written down. I've looked at it. Some Okay. So it's a military hotel resort at disney world. It's kind of. It's pretty close to the poly. It used to be down a walking path. Yeah, the polynesian, they're doing road construction right now so you can't get there. They have their own transportation system. They have their own buses. Yeah, they go to the parks and they're quite. They're done quite. Well, we've never stayed there. We, we've never been there. No, but it's for military personnel, active duty, retired or 100% disabled veterans only.
Speaker 2:Yes, right, although you've told me two times a year, september and January they open it up to veterans, right.
Speaker 1:Correct. Just September and January veterans can get the rates. So the rates are by rank or the standard or the poolside rooms. You looked into that some.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so it's $179 to $239 for the standard room. If you want a standard room that's poolside, which means you just walk out your door and you get to go into the pool the pool's right there it was $189 to $259. But you get a deluxe resort benefits at the parks, right.
Speaker 1:Early entry extra hours, everything. Yeah, everything. It's a deluxe resort. It's not themed Disney at all, no, it's like a golf resort. It's like a golf resort. It's like a golf club. And it used to be the golf club resort.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's a golf course there. Yeah, so it was the golf club resort back originally when Disney started and they turned it over to the Department of Defense to convert to one for military Right, because they've always given benefits, extra one for military Right, because they've always done given benefits, extra benefits to military active duty and retired military. For Disney you can get cheaper tickets. Uh-huh, yeah, a lot of different things like a lot of benefits, like that.
Speaker 1:Right, so this episode started. We started talking about this episode because we started talking about all the things Disney's done for the military. Yes, and it kind of switched. We're not started talking about all the things Disney's done for the military. Yes, and it kind of switched. We're not really talking about that today at all, which we might sometime I should have. I mean, it'd be too long if we started adding all that in today. That would be a lot Right To what they've done. But but look it up, disney's done so much for the military and they still do and they still do this was inspired A couple things for me.
Speaker 1:First, I saw that during Veterans Day weekend maybe, or Memorial Day weekend, disney invited a bunch of sailors from San Diego to Disneyland. They hosted them for the day oh, gave them tickets, yeah and had them do the flag retrieval at the end of the night. They all stood there in uniform, yeah.
Speaker 1:It was just great, they hosted them and had them there at the park and just just made him feel welcome. Yeah, just for a day. And there was there's 40 or 50 of them, I think oh wow, something like that. There's a lot it was a big group. They had a big picture of them by the castle, and they do stuff like that all the time though.
Speaker 1:Yeah all the time they they pick a veteran, usually every day that's wearing like a veteran t-shirt or a veteran hat or something, to help do the flag raising or retrieval every day in the parks and they just treat veterans very well and they did a lot for our war efforts during World War II. Disney's always been very patriotic. He has been and the company has been since it's carried it on through these years. And the second one for me, as anyone that knows me knows, the other thing I talk about other than Disney is the United States Naval Academy and my sons at Cleve Summer there right now and I am so super proud that I talk about it all the time. And that's the other reason this military thing is because he now is active duty military right and can take us for shades of green.
Speaker 1:So if you're active duty, military or you have any of those qualifications to get a room there, you can book up to three rooms at a time, yes, and have anyone there, as long as you have to be there and you have to go to the park, right, you have to go to the park to get the tickets. You can get tickets for your group.
Speaker 2:No, you know, you can buy tickets for other people in your group, but you don't have to go. Those are different tickets.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay, to get the cheap tickets, you have to go oh okay, and have to show your military ID as you go in the park oh okay, there's another. It's called like salute to veterans tickets.
Speaker 2:There's a second type of tickets. Oh, okay, you can buy for other people, but to get the really good discounted tickets, you can't buy those from people. Their website said okay, and those are probably the ones that you can buy tickets, discounted tickets but they weren't discounted a whole lot, Right?
Speaker 1:The ones that are discounted a whole lot. It'd be the military or his immediate family, yeah.
Speaker 2:Right Now one of the things, and I think we can talk about this a little bit more. So they have not only the standard rooms, but they have a lot of suites, and I mean the biggest suite, which is 1,850 square feet, 829 a night, which that's getting up there. How many does that sleep? But it sleeps up to 10.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow, so that's not a lot.
Speaker 2:But they had suites that slept up to 6 to 8 for $500 a night. So they had one that had a king bed in the bedroom. It was like a one-bedroom suite, but there were three queen beds in the living room, okay, and so, yeah, really a lot of space in these, and so you could fit a lot of people in for 500 bucks. And these were five, five, ten, and some of them went up. You know, it depends. Like there were garden suites, but they're junior, and I was at the Palm Suite, but, yeah, something like that. And the Family Suite, right, which had a lot of extra rooms but actual beds. Some of them had sleeper sofas, which are miserable. Like, if you've got kids, they're fine, but if you're going with more adults, nobody wants to sleep on a sleeper sofa, right, and my idea I just came up with just now is the basement of Shades of Green, to have a $50 a night hostel there.
Speaker 1:you go it's full of bunk beds for privates.
Speaker 2:There you go If they can't afford the $179 a night $50 a night. That's it for.
Speaker 1:The caveat there is, you have to get up at 5 am yeah, it's a swab the deck and stuff before you go to the parks. Actually, that should be like 20 bucks a night.
Speaker 2:You need to march in the park Because four of them could bunk up in a regular room for $179.
Speaker 1:Right Zero, six, 30, formation. Yeah, before you go to the park day.
Speaker 2:So a very good deal. The food is all reasonable. They actually do a very early breakfast buffet. I saw it was 6.30 am is when it starts, and it's granted, that was like 20 bucks, but it's pancakes and waffles and omelet bar, all you care to enjoy, all you care to enjoy, all the meats and pastries and whatnot. Oh yeah, but 6.30, which means you can get out the door by 7. Yeah, that's pretty good, not a bad deal there.
Speaker 1:That's pretty good, but here at Cheers to Ears we don't like to keep anything too serious because that's not enough fun to have a drink to no Talk about serious stuff the whole time and give you all. We can't give you too much real information.
Speaker 2:No, that's not us.
Speaker 1:We gotta make some stuff up Right, so we made stuff up today. It's the military episode. It's the military episode. These are non-Disney movies. We went with yes.
Speaker 2:We didn't go Disney after this, and I don't even think they were Teetstone Touchstone Touchstone yeah, not Teetstone Touchstone. I don't like that. Teetstone is a company that I've interacted with professionally.
Speaker 1:So okay, but Touchstone, okay. So these are movies. We picked a military movie from each service. Yes, including Coast Guard and non-Disney, so the Disney stuff stops at Shades of Green. Yes, we're done. You did Coast Guard right?
Speaker 2:Yes, Okay, yeah, it was either that or Merchant Marines, because I kind of really wanted to do the fighting CBs with John Wayne. You could have done that and just. But, yeah, it's, it's not something. It would get the warning if it were on Disney Plus now, yeah, all my, I think, all sensitive.
Speaker 1:I think all mine would. And I wanted to say something else before we started this, because I have a lot of stuff in here then. And PTSD is a real thing, it is Right, and we make joke. We're gonna make jokes today. I'm gonna make jokes today for one of mine. I will right, and they're just jokes. I mean, I want to say that, for I want to say that, first of all, it's a real serious thing, yeah, and yeah, so that's the deepest we've ever gotten, the show probably. Yeah, right, there it's, it's right.
Speaker 2:I just want to say that before I said some stuff on here right, and of course we we only shared what movies we were going to pull from, so we didn't overlap on movies. But other than that, as per usual, we we don't talk about this before we just say, okay, pick one movie from each branch of the military and go with it. Yep, so it's. It's. We pick the characters, what room they would be staying in, the cost of that room. Oh, I didn't do all that.
Speaker 1:Oh, I picked what. What room? No, I just have. I just have guys walk in the park and having their park day.
Speaker 2:Oh, and then I had some trip highlights.
Speaker 1:Yeah, mine are very park day. Okay, what they're wearing when they walk in the park, and they walk in the park I don't have where they're staying at all. Okay, most of my guys would probably be staying in a shelter half.
Speaker 2:So we'll start out. I did Army first. Okay, I picked Platoon, and so we'll also read a brief synopsis. Did you pull out your synopsis of the movies? No, but I can kind of talk about it. Okay, talk about it. So I pulled the IMDb synopsis, just in case people have not seen these movies. So Platoon, yeah, mine's way simpler than yours. Chris Taylor, a neophyte recruit in Vietnam, finds himself caught in a battle of wills between two sergeants, one good and the other evil. A shrewd examination of the brutality of war and the duality of man in conflict, which is really stupid. It was a Vietnam movie, yeah, a very intense Vietnam movie.
Speaker 1:My Marine Corps character talks about the duality of man in the movie.
Speaker 2:I'm sure he does. So we pick characters. I pick four characters from the movie Platoon. So, chris, who's Well, you're going to.
Speaker 2:Charlie Sheen is the main character in the movie. So Sergeant Elias, king and Big Harold, okay. So Forrest Whitaker, willem Dafoe. And King is oh, something, david, I forgot his name. You'd rec One of those guys. You always David Keith. Or David Keith? Yeah, that's who, it was not King, I'm helping you with your stuff over there. Yeah, or david keith? Yeah, that's who, it was not king, I'm helping you with your stuff over there. Yeah, so they're.
Speaker 2:All the guys are private disargents, which means they get. They get the lowest tiered price. So they they went ahead and got two standard rooms because none of them wanted to share a bed, so that there'd be four beds and it's 179 a night, and so these are kind of week-long trips. Now, some of the trip highlights they went in February because they wanted to avoid hot, humid weather, because they want nothing to remind them of the night, and so, yeah, they went in February so it'd be a little cooler. So in Animal Kingdom, they quickly walked through the Asia section to avoid flashbacks.
Speaker 2:Okay, overall, they really like Animal Kingdom because it can be very peaceful, but there were some triggering things. In Asia they always leave before the fireworks start at Epcot or Magic Kingdom and because they're really close to Magic Kingdom in their resort. Yeah, it's the earplugs. They just try to get far away, maybe even Disney Springs on those days they get teary-eyed when they saw the Army Men show at Toy Story Land, you know the Army Men come out and they play and sing. Oh yeah yeah, they all got a little teary-eyed at that one, you know, brought up some memories. But overall their trip is very laid back, with a focus on drinking Lots of cocktails. That's good, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no illegal drugs. No, that's pretty good, because that was pretty big.
Speaker 2:And I got the druggies in this episode. Yeah.
Speaker 1:So I went a different way than you completely on how I did mine. Right, okay, I have Ap. Right Okay, I have Apocalypse Now it's my army movie and you have to with that movie. Captain Lillard is playing Martin Sheen yeah Right, he's my guy in the movie and Apocalypse Now is an army movie again.
Speaker 1:It's kind of like Platoon A lot of similarities yeah, it's a Vietnam movie that he travels down through Cambodia on a little like. Is it a PT boat? Pt boat yeah, a river PT boat Meets a crazy man who looks a lot like the Godfather and some iconic scenes. One of my favorite movies as a kid. Yeah, one of the reasons I started loving the military were movies like this that really showed Do you love the smell of napalm in the morning? That's a good quote. Yes, lucky, I didn't use that. You didn't steal any of my lines. Oh, okay, but Captain Liller narrates the entire movie, so I narrated this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, this is him narrating as the movie and I want you to help me out here. There's some stuff. Guess where I'm at in the parks as I narrate? Okay, right, so he walks in. He walks in. He narrates his entry. Disneyland, a place where dreams come to live or die. I don't know which. Which one is going to happen today. The train moves slowly throughout the compound, no guards, no checkpoints. Either we were welcome or we were already prisoners.
Speaker 1:Okay, this is his day in the park, right, because that's his ride in the train, right, yes, okay, so where is he here? Where is he here? He's at the train station Right now. Where is he in this next one? Okay, ready. It was like Cambodia, but with animatronics no blood, just plastic smiles. But the trees. The trees knew Over Tiana's. That's Jungle Cruise. Jungle Cruise. They are singing and drinking and looting the pirates. I have seen, and I have seen my share. They scream, they don't sing, they keep singing and never stop. Is this what peace is supposed to look like? A kaleidoscope of fake joy. They don't sing, they keep singing and never stop. Is this what peace is supposed to look like? A kaleidoscope of fake joy with nowhere to hide. You know where that is. That's Small World, small World, and the previous one was Pirates. Yes, okay, this is this one. You'll know what ride this is. I knew what lay ahead Another drop, another fall. It never is. I knew what lay ahead Another drop, another fall. It never ends. That's Tiana's. That's Tiana's. Yeah, that's Tiana's, okay.
Speaker 2:I was thinking, okay, so I was going, going around the park, yeah. I was trying to follow your thinking, but you backtracked a little.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I did different stuff with every one too. I just thought of rides at the top of my head. Okay, now he's got the fireworks right. Uh-huh, explosions without consequence, a sky of fire and no one is running away. I've never been more confused at a sequence of events. He's leaving the park. He's done for the day. I got into the heart of the happiest place on earth. I'd survived, but I was not sure if I left anything behind or taking something with me.
Speaker 2:That's my apocalypse now version that is, that is the yes, that is a very good apocalypse. Now, version of disney disney world magic kingdom, okay, okay we're down very different tracks today folks. So I have hints, like hints back to the movies. You have it in the style of the movie Right Right.
Speaker 1:That's what I did. Yeah, yeah, which is good. I like the two different.
Speaker 2:Yes, the duality of podcasts, duality of podcasters, the duality of podcasters, I'm bringing it to you. So my Navy one was Midway Navy.
Speaker 1:Oh, you're going Navy next. Okay, here we go.
Speaker 2:There's a little bit of difference between the old version, the 70s version of Midway with Ford and all those actors, versus the current one, the new version that came out like five years ago or something Right. So I kind of sort of mix them because basically I went with Admiral Nimitz because he's in both of them, but Midway, if you haven't seen it a dramatization of the battle that was widely heralded as the turning point of the Pacific theater of World War II. So I went with the character Admiral Nimitz and think of the more the new one that he was involved with. But I did, instead of multiple characters in the movie, I just did Admiral Nimitz, his family. So I went on Wikipedia and read about his life, oh wow, and his wife and four kids. So they got a family suite for $509 because that fit all of them, the family suite, $509 a night. Also, if you get a suite, there is no difference in price between rank, it's only the standard rooms on the poolside.
Speaker 2:But anyway, I did. Admiral Nimitz Now, first off, he was a little disappointed because he started out as a sub captain. Off, he was a little disappointed because he started out, he's a sub captain. And he was a little disappointed that he wasn't going to disneyland because he wanted to ride, you know, the nemo sub. But he may do okay, you know, because by by the time he was admiral he wasn't getting on ships right, he was just commanding them from land and whatnot. So his trip, the highlights, very highly disciplined trip. You have to to be highly disciplined to make Admiral. So they rope dropped every single day because they'd already been up for two hours anyway.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, highly disciplined, highly disciplined Kids and everybody. Now he made all the ferries, everyone on property. He just kind of took it as his goal to make them run on schedule and in tight formation, very focused, highly disciplined.
Speaker 1:So how disciplined.
Speaker 2:Highly disciplined. So he did rent. Now, a little bit of trouble with the ferries because he couldn't pilot them. He could only command, oh, okay, like Right. But he needed to have control of his own ship. Uh-huh, that had to be part of it. So he did spend a couple hours. He rented a pontoon boat to go around Seven Seas, lagoon and Bay Lake so that he could feeling of being in command of his own ship again. Because you know, a lot of years separated, because you just don't get that as Admiral Right Point where and they go Tight formation, highly disciplined, oh, highly, and but they did have seafood every chance they get. Okay, it's just, it's their thing, it's their thing.
Speaker 1:It's their thing, it's Navy men. They're not land lovers.
Speaker 2:They love the sea Right, and they love the seafood. May or may not be true. I think all his descendants have since passed, so if they, ever hear this Nimitz line is gone. I think it carries on, but all of his children have since died, I believe as well. So thank you, admiral Lemmets, for turning the tide of World War II In a highly disciplined way. In a highly disciplined way, okay for your Navy.
Speaker 1:My Navy movie is A Few Good Men. Okay, but I took a Marine from the movie.
Speaker 2:But you have a different Marine movie for the Marines. I do.
Speaker 1:Okay, but it's a Navy movie with a Marine, because I couldn't pass on Colonel Nathan Jessup. Yeah, played by Jack Nicholson.
Speaker 2:No, right Boy, can you imagine him in the Disneyland?
Speaker 1:I'm going to tell you what he's going's gonna say I did the same kind of thing with nathan jessup. Okay, as he went through disneyland. A few good men is man. I don't know if it's my favorite military movie, but it's right there. Really, one of the most quotable tom cruise is great in it. Timmy moore is great in it. Kevin bacon kevin bacon's great it, and so is what's his name that my dad and I always use Kevin Pollard. Kevin Pollard, he has no responsibility whatsoever. Yeah, he says that a lot right. And my dad says maybe that's the job Eli should try to get in the Navy. I have no responsibility whatsoever. He's an officer. Yeah, yeah, kevin Pollard's a JAG officer.
Speaker 2:And I have no responsibility. He's a.
Speaker 1:JAG officer. Okay, I didn't say that it was a pause, it's a definite pause. So A Few Good Men, one of my favorites. I could watch it anytime, me and Eli just watched it, so did all four.
Speaker 2:Oh no, it's just Colonel, jessup, just.
Speaker 1:Colonel Jessup went. Okay, just the park. I mean, how would they go together?
Speaker 2:Really the park. I mean, how would they go together really, yeah, yeah they couldn't handle it together.
Speaker 1:Keifer sutherland, he might have brought him along, he might have he or kevin bacon?
Speaker 2:yes, was his lawyer. It was his lawyer, well, his lawyer. But I think he would have taken keifer sutherland.
Speaker 1:Yeah, keifer sutherland was his yeah guy. So he shows up to the park in full dress, blues, and he just stares at the crowd like with with his little eyes he gets right, yeah. He goes to the front of the line and declares himself the general mission priority guest of the day. Okay, okay, he said. He said to the person they said well, we don't have a general mission priority guest of the day. And he said you know what, son, I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4,000 screaming kids who are trained to throw popcorn at me. I do not need a lightning lane for rise of resistance. Did it work? It did not work.
Speaker 2:No, no, none of his stuff really works no.
Speaker 1:But he does march down Main Street with the parade as the parade's going through, he marches in a military manner. I bet that confused everyone. And he looks around and says and looks at the little kid and says this town has more flags than honor, son. And he grabs the bike from the skipper on the Jungle Cruise Okay, he grabs the bike and says that's not a hippo, that's a threat to national security.
Speaker 1:He's pretty overbearing. Yeah, he's very overbearing. That's why he doesn't last very long in the park. No, no, he's about done after that. Okay, he only lasts a little bit in the park, but as he leaves, they say they say you have to, you have to go now. You're causing too much problem in the park. Right, you have to leave the park, you're not welcome anymore. And he gets really upset. Right, he kind of shuffles his, he tries his, his medals, like go astray from his. His dress, blue uniform, okay, as he says you guys don't know how reality is. You weep for lines, you curse this heat, you want fun, but you don't want to wait for it. You use words like magic and dreams, but you don't know what these words really mean, because deep down in places you don't want to actually talk about in line the place you want to talk about in line in a churro cart. You want me walking through this park. You need me walking through this park, then he storms off. Then he storms off. That's Colonel Jessup's day at Disneyland.
Speaker 2:Sounds about right, okay, okay, moving right along. Air Force, air Force. I picked the right stuff. So the US Space Program's development, from the breaking of the sound barrier to selection of the Mercury 7 astronauts from a group of test pilots with a more seat-of-the-pants approach than the program's more cautious engineers preferred. So seven astronauts portrayed in the right stuff. I don't have their list, such a great movie. And they all go on the trip, except for Gus Grissom who tragically died at the top on I forget which Apollo mission but where it burned Right. So he was not able to make it. But there's six, so they're all captains and majors. So they went ahead and got two junior suites Because there were three beds in each. Let me break it down what they do yes, two junior suites, $479 a night, times two Okay.
Speaker 1:That's a lot for a salary of a 1960s astronaut.
Speaker 2:Yes, lot for a salary of a 1960s astronaut, yes, well, so we have to suspend some reality here, because some of these are just spread out. All right, because technically midway was before it was even built. Yeah, yeah, 25 years right before. So they were very big fans of astro orbiter and mission to space and they even did the Orange. They could handle the Orange mission with ease.
Speaker 1:Imagine Chuck Norris on Astro Orbiter. Chuck Norris, chuck Yeager, chuck Yeager. Right, I can imagine Chuck Norris too.
Speaker 2:That's a whole different show yeah. Actually Astro Orbiter orbits Chuck Norris.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah, I know, I said that for a reason.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, and you know, also big fans of all the other space right, Spaceship, earth, guardians of the Galaxy, space Mountain, yeah, still big fans of all the other space-related. They're okay with the Star Wars, but the other ones space that was their thing, but really, multiple times on mission to space in Astro Orbiter, that just hit right. Multiple times, multiple times, multiple times.
Speaker 1:Because it was their thing. It's not even exciting to us. No, the astronaut would actually. That was their thing. They could eat dinner. Yeah, riding Space Mountain.
Speaker 2:So while the Star Wars wasn't necessarily their thing, they did set the record for highest score on Millennium Falcon Smuggler's Run, highest score in history. Okay, because they could pilot that ship better than anybody you know, and they knew when to launch the missiles and launch the catapult. There was no screwing around here. They should make Harrison Ford fly that?
Speaker 1:Oh, they should, I know, and just check his score. You're a fraud, you're a fraud, you're a fraud.
Speaker 2:You're a fraud, you loser. So they sampled every martini and old-fashioned on property, because, Okay, that's sweet, yeah, that's good, because I mean, that's classy, classy, astronaut, classy, astronaut, classy. Now they didn't take any of the public transportation. They instead chose to drive Corvettes to each of the parks every day. Nice, I like this Because that is an astronaut thing, right.
Speaker 1:Especially from that era. Right, it's an F-16 pilot thing too. Oh, is it? That's what I told Eli. I told Eli for years that he's going to have a Corvette and Addy has to get like to just afford the Corvette when he's a young officer. Addy's going to have to drive some crappy car and she's got to drive the Corvette because that's for pilots. Yeah Right, Corolla. Yeah. Sometimes I point out cars in the parking lots when I'm with Addy. Oh, that could be your car.
Speaker 2:So very much an astronaut thing. I think Corvette actually planned that back in the 60s Probably, and the 70s, where they put them in Corvettes Right Because they were famous and they were national heroes. But yeah, they decided to just drive their Corvettes every day.
Speaker 1:It would also be cool to skydive into the park they can parachute in. I mean only if their plane crashed, Right, yeah, but they also have a train in it, probably in some way.
Speaker 2:Well, they'd have to, so that when they get launched out of their plane they do what you know Just be fun, land right. But yeah, either or, but. You know. The choice is to go with the Corvette. You know different colors.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, and different years Right in a line.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, love it. And they all go in formation, right, yes, kind of like the Blue Angels, but Corvettes Right. Yeah, the right stuff. Love this. Okay, that's the right stuff, your.
Speaker 1:Air Force. My Air Force is Dunkirk. Okay, dunkirk's a really good movie. It's kind of lesser known.
Speaker 1:Also well before Disney World was built, it's Allied troops in 1940, and the troops are trapped on a beach in France. The Allied troops are yeah, they've got to rescue them. So they rescued over 330,000 troops who evacuated during the time. During the time they're in the period of the movie Right, and I chose Alex, who's played by Harry Styles. Yeah, for the park he comes in dressed in World War Two fatigues. So security is deeply concerned with this guy coming in the parks. Ok, this is in World War Two fatigues.
Speaker 1:He flinches at every sound of children's joy. Every time he hears a children's joy, he's like flinches. Why is that? Because he's because he's nervous. Oh, from all the. It's a ptsd thing, I think. Bombs going right, yeah, right. He sees the castle and he calls it a decoy because the beach has to be behind it. Yeah, the castle's a decoy. There's no way. That's the real castle's, real Behind us, the beach. They're trying to fool us. Yeah, right, space Mountain. He screams bloody murder and tries to eject the whole time. There's something that fast in his life, yeah, what's this whole thing doing Lots of turbulence, yeah Right.
Speaker 1:He gets a churro but he wonders why they ruined good bread with cinnamon and sugar. And he sees someone throw away a turkey leg. Right, he's walking past, he's eating his churro. He sees someone throw away a turkey leg and restrains himself from starting a brawl. He's wasting good food. He doesn't like that. No, doesn't like that. And my small world one for this one, okay. This song's in every bloody language. Why? And he jumps out of the boat to storm the beach, did?
Speaker 2:he keep his clothes on. He did.
Speaker 1:That's the first thing I thought of. I didn't add that, yeah, he wasn't that guy?
Speaker 2:Right, don't be that guy.
Speaker 1:Right, he watches a parade, yes, and sees Mickey walking by and he's like totally nervous that Mickey doesn't know what this thing is. Yeah, what is this thing? Season from 1940.
Speaker 2:Yes, right, maybe what Mickey Mouse was.
Speaker 1:He didn't know. He's. England in 1940? The war? I don't know. He didn't know. This guy, I mean he grew up in yeah, possibly, I don't know how I made it up. He goes to pure flight or fight mode. He chooses flight, runs Island Park, he's a pilot, and then he ends his day with a pretzel and he climbs up the castle and sits on top of the castle and has his pretzel alone by himself Because he likes peace and quiet.
Speaker 2:He went and got German food.
Speaker 1:Yep, he got a pretzel. It's pure bread, bread, he wants bread, he's the one with the cinnamon sugar. That's the key here. Yeah, the key isn't german food still a pretzel you can. You can fight the nazis and have it and have a schnitzel and have it and enjoy their food, right?
Speaker 2:I hate you as country, but your food's pretty good.
Speaker 1:We didn't hate the country and their food and the people of the country. We hated the Nazis. Yeah, it was different then. The 40s was a party we were fighting, not the country of Germany.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's why they called them all krauts. Yeah, Nazis and other Asians.
Speaker 1:I was trying to beef up my argument. Okay, that was my.
Speaker 2:Air Force, sure Air Force. Okay, marines, marines, hoorah, gomer Pyle, usmc. So the misadventures of a bumbling US Marine named Gomer Pyle. This is a spinoff of Andy Griffith, it is so Gomer Pyle goes with Sergeant Carter, vince Carter, because of their rank, they get the standard room for the cheapest price $179. Now, they can't stand. It's not that they can't stand each other, but Gomer can stand him. Yes, he probably considers them very good friends, right. But, sergeant Carter, when you're dealing with a bumbling idiot, you just it causes some and you have anger issues. It's going to cause them to swell up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and Sergeant Carter wasn't a model Marine himself. No, he acted like he was. Yeah, I know that guy.
Speaker 2:So you know highlights from their trip. They missed every bus on the trip coming and going. They missed it. They'd be walking up and the bus would just be pulling away. They would always be five minutes late and all the transportation they would always be like just a couple minutes late. Every single time They'd be pulling away right as they were walking up. Sergeant Carter throws cover down, yeah, and plays pile, yeah. So because you know, pile's got to stop and tie his shoes or look at a flower or just be looking around and it delayed them by two minutes and he'd just do something that delayed them by two minutes and they'd always miss the bus. I like that.
Speaker 2:They managed to get hopelessly lost multiple times per day. Okay, like in the parks. You know, one time they walked into Magic Kingdom and next thing, they know, they were down at Disney Springs. That's how lost they got, and then they were late for the bus. So they only ate hot dogs for lunch and dinner all week because they just couldn't quite figure out any of the other foods. So they just went and ate hot dogs. It was just and none of that fancy food, right, you know, because Gomer just doesn't trust that fancy food. No, no, he grew a Mayberry. Yeah, hamburgers and whatnot. No, aunt Bee's pie, aunt Bee's pie, aunt Bee's pie.
Speaker 2:So they hold the record for participating in the most ride evacuations in the day. Like every ride they got on mysteriously broke down and they'd have to be evacuated. Then they set the record on their first day. They proceeded to break the record three more times. Nice, they even broke it going to Animal Kingdom. They broke the record again. Yeah, just every ride. They kept getting broken down, broken down, broken down. Lion King show broke down and, yes, the fire got out of control. They got evacuated. For the Lion King show it was multiple, like the little cart, like the monkeys doing their spinning. Yeah, lines would break, they'd fall and then or catch fire, mayhem ensued, mayhem ensued. They actually managed to fall out of the Skyliner, okay, and it broke down while they were there and they didn't get injured because it's a comedy show, yeah Right.
Speaker 2:Well, they fell into the lake. Oh yeah, yeah, it was over the Hourglass Lake. They were going to Pop Century to get another hot dog possibly. So well, it was one of the. Well, let's go this way. I think this is the right way. And they got lost. Right, it's one of the times it got lost. So, yeah, they managed to fall out of the Skyliner. Somehow. They got the door open and fell out. Because that's Gomer Pyle. I like that one. That was funny, gomer Pyle on his trip.
Speaker 1:Mine's not as funny, because I have a full metal jacket.
Speaker 2:I would hope not. I would hope that's not as funny.
Speaker 1:It's a movie that starts out in Parris Island yes, it's a place where the phony tough and the crazy brave go and it follows the story of a bunch of recruits at Parris Island and their time in boot camp, which, except for the end of boot camp scene, it's totally like real boot camp. Yeah, it's the most realistic version I've marines watch.
Speaker 2:It all the time marines watch that 100 times in a day.
Speaker 1:it follows, it just follows them and then into the war, into the vietnam war afterwards. Yeah, and I chose joker, okay, going to the park because one of my characters played by matthew modine great, great cast, well-written Stanley Kubrick movie, just a good story. And he says so it goes back to the duality of man thing. Yes, he gets yelled at by a colonel in the field in the army. He has a helmet that says born to kill on it and he wears a peace button. Yeah, and the colonel asks him, with some choice words in between, why he's born. He says I don't know, sir. I think it has something to do with do I'll be a man, sir? Do I'll be what? So, yeah, the other choice words ensue.
Speaker 1:So at 9 am he enters the park with an olive drab jacket and a born-to-kill, his born-to-kill helmet and his peace button on Security, takes his born-to to kill helmet and we'll have it back. Right, he has that. He has a smirk on his face like he's about right a lot of the war cry at any moment. Yeah, okay. He walks down main street, stands in the middle with his hands on his hip and he says this is what america smells like funnel cakes and dreams he thinks it feels like a lot like Vietnam. But the Mickey's do not hide in the trees.
Speaker 2:And nobody offers to love you. They'll love him long time.
Speaker 1:Right, well, yeah, that's another scene. No cast members Watch the movie for some of these scenes that we'll talk about in the show. So his thoughts on the day. Okay, here's some of his thoughts on the day. Haunted Mansion the only thing that's scarier than ghosts is unquestioned patriotism. He thinks the blue milk tastes like the middle of the Cold War. Small world. He falls into a thousand yard stair, walks out quietly and sneaks a cigarette behind the ride.
Speaker 1:It's my small world, pirates of the Caribbean. Finally, some ambitious looting I can get behind. He goes to the parade and he catches himself kind of smiling and feels really guilty because he's smiling, kind of likes it. He doesn't know why. Yeah, you can understand his feelings. And then he goes to fireworks. Fireworks feels like he's at home, he throws it. Then he throws out his john wayne impression. Okay, then he goes to fireworks and he feels at home and he throws out a John Wayne impression, uh-huh, right. And he says there's joy here, something like where I'm from. That's what he says. Okay, I don't know why he says that I wrote it down and I don't know what I said. Let me redo that one more time, okay. Okay, I'll just use his. I'm just going from the movie. Okay, he goes to the fireworks, he fills it, he fills at home with the fireworks and then he goes to his John Wayne impression and he says is that you, john Wayne? Is this me?
Speaker 2:That's my Joker. Okay, so my last one Coast Guard. So I picked the Finest Hours Coast Guard makes a daring rescue attempt off the coast of Cape Cod after a pair of oil tankers are destroyed during a blizzard in 1952. So, based off of a true story? Yeah, actually, most of mine were, except for Gomer Pyle, were based off of true stories.
Speaker 2:And Gomer Pyle has some truth in it. Yeah, there's some truth in it. I went with the main character, bernie Weber, but it was a trip for Bernie andie and his betrothed, who's now his wife, miriam weber. Okay, he's a chief warrant officer. That was his final rank when I looked him up, so poolside room for 239. So they went. They were more romantic, looking for the romantic trip. So they take the firework cruise. You know their highlights Firework cruise on Seven Seas Lagoon Okay, so firework seating at Epcot. They just wanted to sit and watch the fireworks Hold hands.
Speaker 2:Aww, slow strolls throughout all the parks without actually going on any rides or seeing any shows. They just stroll around the park holding hands. How cute the whole time, the park holding hands. How cute the whole time. The whole time, for 12 hours Staring Sarah's eyes and not write a single thing. Right, the country pavilion satisfied their need for world travel. Okay, we don't need to go to France. I kind of agree with them. Yeah, I'm kind of there too. I'm down with that. You know, if school bread sums up going to Norway, I'm good. Yeah, I've been there. Yeah, I've been to Norway. Right, I drank myself through Canada. I have some like Mickey ears with little horns on them and tufts of fur.
Speaker 1:I don't think I can get a better mixed drink in Canada than the auto apple. No, I'm good, yeah, been to Canada, the auto apple. No, I'm good, yeah, been in canada.
Speaker 2:Well, I have been in canada, so romantic dinners and visits, ice cream shops, were the most constant activities. Okay, so they just constantly have a romantic dinner right for lunch and and dinner. If they could get away with a romantic breakfast they would have, but like ice cream shops, just sitting in an ice cream shop, it's going to be very romantic pastime for the young leopards. So, yes, the Finest Hours, coast Guard Actually one of my favorite movies Really, and I believe it's actually a Disney movie oh, really, yes, oh, there you go.
Speaker 1:I went with Perfect Storm. Okay, I love Perfect Storm, it's about the Coast Guard rescue jumpers. Yes, and we have actually close to us is a huge Coast Guard base At the museum. There's a base there too. Oh yeah, yeah, it's got some of the toughest tides, so they train there a lot for that, because the tides between the river and the ocean meeting are some of the heaviest. The bar, the bar, the bar. We don't live in Boston. No People might think that.
Speaker 1:Well, mine the finest hours they can't get over the bar in weather like this. So I put Billy Tyne, captain Billy Tyne, george Clooney's character in Perfect Storm. Oh, okay, okay, he comes in wearing an old fishing jacket. He walks in the gate, grabs a map of the park and says we head port, past the castle veer starboard toward Adventureland. No, sudden course changes. Okay, then he goes to Pirates. He says Smells like home. Now, this is how men used to live. He goes to Jungle Cruise. The next ride is Jungle Cruise. They go to Jungle Cruise. That ain't proper current. You're drifting to the Cruise. The next ride is Jungle Cruise. They go to Jungle Cruise. That ain't proper current. You're drifting to the left. You call that storytelling. I once saw a man lose a toe to a halibut and I made that crap poetic. He goes to Splash. Oh, I have Splash Mountain, I meant Tiana's. Okay, he goes to Tiana's.
Speaker 2:He seemed like the type to be pissed. It's not still Splash Mountain? He might be pissed. It's not Splash Mountain, he might call it that anyway.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he might go to Splash Mountain, even though it's Deanna's. He might sing Zippity-Doo-Dah at the end while everyone else is singing the other song. I think he would, yep, but he goes on the. He thinks that he goes on the drop.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's not a drop. Tell me when you face the southeaster. A nor'easter.
Speaker 1:Right, he's walking towards the exit, but the Dapper Dans are singing Okay, uh-huh. He says you know, we once sang like that in a tavern right before sailing into hell. He decides there's nothing left for him to do here. The sea awaits he.
Speaker 2:There's nothing left for him to do here. The sea awaits, he leaves. He boards a ferry and leaves. Yeah, all right. So that is our summation of how each of the branches of military would go to Disneyland. Right, I'm sure it's exactly like that, probably, and all stay in shades of green.
Speaker 1:And if you see Nathan Jess up at Disneyland, just steer clear yeah, but until next time, until next time.
